Books and mic stands.

December 27, 2010 § Leave a comment

“There isn’t a hell where we’ll be sent, there’s only now, there isn’t then, so breathe it in.” – No key No plan – Okkervil river.

I have my marching orders. Dubrovnik for a few days then back to America, Chicago to be precise, but that’s all in the New Year, I’m looking forward to it. I am coming to that point of rest when you turn the corner and start to itch for what you are staying away from. I have friends in Dubrovnik, my first gig in this magazine job was there, the editor had faith in my ability but nevertheless sent a local to meet me at the airport. I was just a kid when I got off the plane and met him that day. His name was, and still is, Luca Ivanovic when I met him he was dressed like one of those young European skater kids. Dubrovnik is a very special city. It’s a mature man’s Paris, it’s humble with class and fine food. The town in the Old City walls a car free paradise and has been a major tourist destination for people of all nations since the end of a war that left it shattered. The Old town was always my favourite. It was there I realised my jobs potential, we laughed and ate steak in a four star restaurant, we drank cheap Croatian beer till 2 in the morning then we moved onto the only Irish bar in town. We left there at 5 and went swimming in the clean blue sea that surrounds the place. I had no hangover when I wrote my 300 internet submitted words. I was wide eyed and was yet to take the job for granted. I can see now the error of my ways.

Perspective is a very important thing and we often loose sight of it. It’s human nature to get wrapped up in our own little worlds and I know that I’ve been more than guilty of that on almost every occasion, hell I’m doing it right now. Whether it be being engrossed in a football match or in a relationship or in your own problems that barely count and we loose sight of the bigger picture. We seem to be doing it more and more. We need to relax more, I need to relax more. Hey, there’s no hell when you die so don’t look so worried.

I need to remember the attitude of my 14 year old self. When I was on holiday in France. There was a cable car that steeply lead to a mountain top which promised a view. Me and my father were sat at the bottom watching the cable cars go up and down and he was deciding whether or not he wanted to go on them. “I’m scared” he said, I’m still not sure if he was joking, I said “What’s the worst that could happen?” He replied “The cables could snap and we could die.” So, and I remember what I said very clearly, little 14 year old me turned to him and just said “If the cables snapped then we would fall to our deaths, but think about it, I mean really think about what that means, no more mortgage, no more dickheads, no more arguments, no more loss, no more deadlines and no more work, you say that the worst thing that can happen is that we both die, I say the worst thing that can happen is we get to the top and we are sill alive.

So do it, chance your arm, don’t look so worried, what’s the worst that could happen?


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