Leave the liberty in that broken bell, today.

April 19, 2011 § 1 Comment

“Leave those bad ideas in your troubled head, today.”- I must belong somewhere – Bright Eyes.

Last night was all broken glass and pistols, a real train wreck, just like the night Maxi died. I woke this morning at the end of a bed in a motel room on what I thought was the outskirts, the place was a real mess, people all around stirring, smashed furniture. There was no one there I knew. I stumbled out into the harsh sunlight, my jeans were stained with what looked like booze and my shirt was dirty. That familiar voice came out butted into my thoughts “Your going to be sick.” Fuck. The mouth goes dry and the heartbeat picks up. Legs engage, to the alleyway, you have less than 10 seconds. I wretch by a dumpster before I force it all up, then its just the after bits, the stomach lining coming up with all the oxygen and gas. I always feel better after that. Up off my knees. Half digested alcohol in front of me. The unfortunately familiar smell of vodka warmed by the body. Where the fuck am I? No idea, California somewhere. I checked my pockets for my phone and wallet, they are there, along with an electronic car key. I stumble into the car park of the motel, look around at the cars and just click down the “unlock symbol” away to my right a car springs into noise. A 1970’s Dodge Charger was the car the key belonged too, the owner must have fit a modern locking system to it, it looked pretty run down and beat up around the edges, but it was my ticket out of wherever I was, so I jumped in.

It’s not my car so I really didn’t give a fuck, I find reverse on the heavy old gearbox and ram it into it before dropping the clutch and bursting out of the parking space across the car park, the car may have been old but the engine still had a kick. I was about to put it into first when I saw her, the messy brunette, shirt skirt, ripped shirt, long legs and stood in the doorway I had come from, as far as I could tell she was in the same state as me, in a lighter gearbox I would have left her behind. “I can get a lift?” She asked through a squint, obviously the light was not kind on her eyes either, Australian, I was sure of it. “Sure, hope in.” She took the long walk around the car and into the passengers seat, first gear, wheel spin, gone. Straight forward onto the main road before I even knew where I was going. The car was quiet with a comfortable hangover silence, just the engine and the wind through the open windows. It took about 15 minutes before she spoke again “You don’t remember me do you?” I was bad with people at the best of times, drunk is no where near the best of times. “No, I’m afraid not.” “I’m Rosey Graham.” She replied. I looked at her cock-eyed to try and stir memories of the night before. “Nice to meet you Rosey, so is this your car?” – ” I have no idea who’s car this is.” – “Well, I think we have about two hours before the owner recovers enough from his hangover to report it stolen, so where do you want to go?” – “Anywhere, I don’t care.” She replied. Sometimes people say things that just stick in your head, defining moments in relationships that stay with you and help define in your mind who that person is and what that person stands for, like some sort of profile, those four words caught my imagination. Rosey Graham. We smiled. I floored the power and we started eating up the miles, we still had half a tank. I had no idea who this girl was. I just knew we were running away from it all together and that was enough for me, it still is.


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