Robert Ford and Jesse James

April 29, 2015 § Leave a comment


B&C

So roll, roll down rob a rail road train, lil’ ol’ Robert Ford did Jesse James” – Love is only a heartbeat away – Jamie T 

Through the haze and hum of the booze in blood I could hear a familiar chorus. The speakers had blown long ago and it was left to leave a shaking buzz over the heavier bass notes. With my brain struggling to stay above the clear spirit lake that I had set it swimming in I could place the band, or the song, or even the lyrics. It’s was just familiar, that was all I had as I stared through the crowd and dark and the bodies criss crossing the spot light beams in some basement bar. In it’s desperation to stay above the flat line my mind throws out a memory of my childhood. Six year old me, dwarfed by the surrounding trees, watching a bird cut and glide through the scattered sunbeams under the canopy of a forest. A body crashes down next to me onto the battered bar sofa and breaks my train of thought.

I skip the bar and slip out in to the street. Past the smoking Oxford kids and their fucking ditch water political opinions, not one original idea between them. They’ll never know common people. They’ll never know anything outside of their comfort zone. But who I am to judge, there are things they get in a heartbeat that I don’t get near. Focus, motivation, application of themselves. We should all be so lucky. I get away from it all. Down the back streets as the thick bass notes fade with the laughter of the kids under the heaters.

I’ve always been more Robert Ford than Jesse James. More George Milton than Lennie Small. More Lee Harvey than John Fitzgerald. I never really bought into all that Bonny and Clyde stuff, sign me up for Frank Harmer.

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